Hotel living during a PCS can be tough for many reasons. Here are a few tips to save your sanity during the days (or weeks!) of living in temporary lodging during your move.
When you’re living in temporary lodging during a PCS, chances are you and your family are out of your normal routine – you may not be able to cook at all, or as easily as you did in your own home, your family might feel like they’re living on top of each other as you have less space, shared rooms, and tiny living quarters, and to top it off you have *a lot* going on with the logistics of your move that take time and physical energy to coordinate as well as significant mental energy. All of this can be incredibly overwhelming.
I’ve been there, friend, and know how hard it can be. I’m writing this to you while taking a little solo coffee break on the Saturday morning that marks seven weeks and four days of hotel living for our family during our move from Fort Leavenworth, Kansas to Oahu, Hawaii, and we still have about three more weeks to go until we move into permanent housing.
So, I would love to share some tips we’ve embraced in order to lessen the stressors of temporary lodging, in hopes that it helps you navigate your move with more mental, emotional, and physical wellness.
1. Talk and adapt together regularly
This might seem obvious off the bat – but communication is key when you’re living in temporary lodging and stress is high. What I want to encourage you to do though, is not generally communicate “better” – I want to encourage you to communicate about just one really important and specific thing: each of your self care needs. Here are some examples of questions you can bring to your family (your spouse and your kids!) to have this really important conversation:
Start with understanding needs:
- What is your top self-care need today/this week? (Emphasis on a short time frame because our needs can change quickly during tumultuous times like PCSing!)
- What do you need to feel calm and happy today?
- What is triggering more stress?
- What is one thing you would love to do if we had time today (The key here is to understand the desire, then what’s important is to make the time to prioritize this activity/action!)
Then, move towards building solutions and adapting together:
- How can I help support you in taking care of your top self care need today/this week? (Then really make every effort to accommodate!)
- How can we structure the day/week so that each member of our family is able to do what they need to feel secure and happy?
Finally, prioritize checking in regularly on these questions. This might mean talking at the end of each evening the first week or two of your hotel stay. Especially in the beginning of a long stay or the entirety of a short one, each day brings different challenges and needs. If you’re long hauling it like we are, after the first few weeks you might have found a rhythm that’s starting to work for you and your family (cheering you on!!!) so you can shift to talking every week, whenever something feels off, or when there are changes to your routine (we had to adapt once my husband started in processing for his new job, for example)
2. Balance “work” and play
This one is pretty simple, and so important! The idea is to balance the work of your PCS move – the logistics of packing, unpacking, finding providers, setting up appointments, in processing, house hunting, etc. with activities that give your family moments to reset, connect with each other, have fun, and replenish the mental and emotional energy that often drains away during the slug of moving.
Simple things we have been doing while living in temporary lodging, especially in the whirlwind of the first few weeks of hotel living:
- Make sure to do at least one fun family activity a day (ex: go to the hotel pool)
- Eat meals together outside (fresh air and sunshine do wonders!)
- Once we got a little more settled: split the day and did the “work” of PCS logistics in the morning and had a family activity planned for the afternoon (ex: going to a beach, visiting a local museum, finding a new coffee shop or restaurant to visit)
- When leaving a duty station: make a bucket list of activities you want to do before you go or visit one last time
- When arriving at a new duty station: make a list of activities you want to do, especially if your spouse has time off before in-processing!
3. Reset the room
This last tip is a mental game changer for us: resetting the room each day to ensure it is as clutter-free as possible. I’m not talking about a deep clean here, I’m proposing you take 5-10 minute MAX and whip your way around your hotel room tidying up anything that snags your eyes and zaps your energy when you look at it. Reducing clutter will free up mental energy and help you feel more in control of your surroundings and circumstances. It’s an “easy win” you can do anytime you’re feeling overwhelmed.
Here are some tips:
- Make the bed
- Line up shoes in the closet or by the door
- Take advantage of hotel closets, drawers, or even suitcases to put away clothes (here’s your permission: you don’t even need to fold them)
- Straighten towels and toiletries
- Put dishes in the dishwasher if you have a kitchen
- Take advantage of room service! Call in housekeeping and ask for a room refresh
Meet Casie
Casie is a Space Force spouse, mother, published author and wellness advocate. She and her husband have been stationed in six states with the Space Force, Air Force, Navy, and Army over the last ten-plus years of their marriage. As a lifelong athlete with a degree in International Health and Development, she is passionate about all things relating to personal wellness and thrives when she is active, connected to her community, and serving others. You can connect with her and find more wellness education and resources on her Instagram: @casie.rendon.wellness or on Facebook.
