When I was planning my 2022 wedding, I knew I wanted the event to reflect the things that were important to us as a couple. As part of a dual-mil couple and coming from a military family, we definitely wanted to integrate that part of our lives in our wedding as well. If you recently got engaged to a service member (or are a servicemember yourself) – congratulations! One of the best parts of being in the military is getting to partake in its rich traditions! Here’s how to incorporate some of military traditions in your wedding.
Venue
Using the base chapel and/or officer’s club for your ceremony or reception can be a very cost effective option. Just be sure to consider the logistics of getting your non-military guests on and off base. The service academies have iconic venues available for those who are eligible (requirements can be found on the chapel’s websites). Regardless of where you hold your wedding, the base chaplain is a great resource if you’ll be doing a religious ceremony. My husband and I had a short engagement (3 months) and we worked with the priest at our duty station to get everything squared away on a condensed timeline for our destination Catholic ceremony.
Attire
Don’t we all love to see a man in uniform? With my husband being Navy and my dad and me being Air Force, it was really cool to see so many of our guests donning their respective uniforms. The great thing about dress uniforms is that they work with a variety of dress codes, from white tie to cocktail. For the Air Force, this typically means mess dress. For the Navy and Marines, there are multiple variations and the time of year or rank will determine what’s appropriate. Just be sure to coordinate this with everyone in the wedding party so everyone looks, well, uniform.
Something to note that I didn’t think of for my own wedding – boutonnieres won’t be necessary for those in uniform, so have that in mind when you order your flowers!
Arch of Swords/Sabers
The sword arch is a staple at military weddings (and makes for great photos!) Typically the sword arch will occur as the newlywed couple exits the ceremony with 6-8 swordsmen. As the couple passes each row, the swordsmen will block their path and request “a kiss to pass”. After each kiss, the swordsmen will raise their swords into an arch. If you prefer, you can have only the last row request the kiss to pass. As you exit the sword arch you can expect to be welcomed to the military with a tap on the behind by one of the swordsmen. Since we’re dual-mil, my husband got welcomed to the Air Force with a tap as well (much to his surprise).
Make sure to give your swordsmen plenty of time to track down a sword, as not everyone has them. This is a good time to utilize squadron group chats. You’ll also want the swordsmen to rehearse sometime prior to the ceremony to ensure flawless execution!
Cake Cutting
Another way swords or sabres are commonly used at military weddings are for the cake cutting. The couple uses the sword to cut the first slice of cake before serving it to each other.
Other Fun Ideas:
I love seeing creative ways people have included small touches that reference the military. Here’s some ways to make it your own:
- I’ve seen a few variations of using name tapes for the bride’s “something blue”.
- At my wedding, we had our own version of “rules of the mess” printed on the back of the menus.
- At Navy weddings, I’ve seen plenty of nods to Top Gun – most commonly the bride being serenaded with “You’ve Lost That Lovin’ Feeling” by all the Navy men in attendance.
- Once dinner is over and the festivities are really underway, you’ll often see those in uniform taking off their jackets to reveal their party shirts.
Meet Haley
Haley is one half of a dual-mil couple. Her husband is a pilot in the Navy, while she’s serving in the Air Force. She’s been a WAF for two years and grew up as a military brat. Some of her hobbies include traveling, hiking, and wine tasting… but you can usually find her hanging out at home with her German Shepherd, Tug.
