How To Grow Closer to Your Spouse During a PCS Move

Whether you have been a military spouse for one day or for one decade, it’s easy to think that if you can make it through long distance or a deployment, you could make it through anything. But then you get hit with another PCS.

Between juggling house-hunting, selling your current home, packing up all your belongings, worrying about your kids (human or furry) transition, and scheduling appts – its no surprise why PCSing is a major stressor on your marriage! But as we know all too well in the military community, what doesn’t kill you really does make you stronger. Below are our favorite ways to reconnect with our spouse amidst a crazy PCS move.

Schedule It

Sounds romantic, huh? But when the rest of your life is run by a checklist, it’s easy to miss making time for each other when it’s not explicitly scheduled out. Whether its moving dinner plans to a picnic blanket in your backyard, having a movie night/slumber party in your living room once your HHG (household goods) has been picked up, or scheduling a babysitter 1x a week leading up to the move (because who knows how long it’ll be before your find one at your next assignment?!) setting aside time to forget the crazy for an hour or so can be so grounding for a relationship.

Check In With Each Other

It happens quick. You turn into PCS mode and suddenly the only texts you send to each other is a continuation of your to-do list (shared notes are truly amazing for this). Maybe you need to set a reminder for yourself on your phone, but check in with your spouse emotionally. Maybe its a weekly conversation of “How can I support you this week?” or just a simple “How are you doing today?” text, the little things really do count!

Lean Into Their Love Language (And Be Sure To Communicate Yours!)

When you are in survival mode, it’s easy to just hit each others basic needs. But to continue to grow together during this time (and keep tension at bay) acknowledging and acting on their love language can go a long way to strengthen your relationship!